You shan’t regret this.
Thank you so much for signing up for the Junk Pirate email list. I truly respect the bravery and fortitude it takes to actually enter a legitimate email in there.
A clever, yet concise communique of confirmation has already been sent to you with all the details of the great things you can expect from joining such an exclusive (yet inclusive) league of creative innovators.
I promise I won’t email you more than a few times a year or share your email address with anybody. You can opt out at any time. Sure, my feeling might be a little hurt but I’ll get over it in time.
In the meanwhile, take the rest of the day off. You’ve done good, my friend.
You’ve done good.